sick of it all

i hate where iam at by that i mean the place i live good ol beatrice its the crapest place for finding jobs cuz its seems to me the only way to get a job here and all the places that i have apply at and the people that get the job over me or stoners what the crap is that come on do i need to that stuff just so i can get a job to get money so i can go to school cuz i deprsteley need a job so i can go on with my life so i can go to school well i got to go bye

what i have larned this month

what i have larned this month 1. theres no point on stewing over stuff thats in the past 2. u cant help every one or let ur poroblems run ur life 3.girls like to be called beautiful and NOT hot 4. theres someone out there who cares about if even if u dont know it 5. drinking 5 energy drinks in one setting is not a good idea 6. most of my firendes or girls not guys 7. they must trust me cuz they tell me every thing more to come as i go

the kill

THE KILL

Have u ever wanted somthing so bad that it kills in the inside well i have

i was sitting on my porch early this moring at 1:00 am and i was think about stuff that happen in the past and think about God and one of the thougfht that went though my head was if the earth is in Gods hand that would make God super big and it hard to conceive to idea on really how great God is like honsty look around you you see trees grass nature what outher gods can do that let me think um.... none my GOD IS BEST THERE WAS THE IS AND THE BEST THERE EVER WILL BE

and it kills me that i try to do every thing by my self cuz i know he is

there i want to have a Relationship with my GOD and get rid off all the crap in my life i wis that i could perss the rewind button and statr all over with GOD and tara well i t kills me that what i did to tara i wish i knew how she felt me wishing is like tosing a a tine rock in to the ocean it realy dont matter what i wish only God can help me know but do u think i will i hvent yet mabye i should ok GOD here u go you take it and make what to u want cuz rember when i told u that i was gonna trust u more well i gonna trust u in this matter rather we date or not date its in your hands know and or if u have anouther gurl in mind for me just show me what to do God cuz this is getting to much for me GOD iam crying out for help

AND I KOWN YA WILL

LOST MY PRINCESS

LOST MY PRENCESS

HOW COULD I BEEN SO BLIND TO THE SIGNS THEY WERE RIGHT IN MY FACE

OK U MOST OF YOU ARE PROBLEY WONDERING WHAT I MEAN BY I LOST MY PRINCESS WELL THIS WEEKEND WAS THE WORST WEEK EVER LETS GO BACK TO SATURDAY THE DAY WAS GOING FINE WACTHING FOOTBALL GO GATORS NEWAYS THEN I GOT ON LINE AND TALKED TO MY EX GURLFIREND WELL THAT WAS INTRESTING I FOUND OUT STUFF AND A ND THE I WAS TALK ING TO MY BEST BEST FRIEND I TELL HER EVERY THING AND SHE TELLS ME EVERY THING AND SO MY FRIEND TARA READ THE MESSAGE I LEFT HER AND SHE SAID WE WERE COOL AND ALL

THEN I ASK HER IF I WOULD HAVE ASK OUT IF SHE WOULD HAVE GONE OUT WITH ME AND SHE SAID SHE WOULD WOW DID I EVER MAKE THE BIGGIST MESSTAKE CUZ LIKE A SAID THE SGINS WERE IN MY FACE I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY I WENT OUT WITH THE OUTHER GURL WHEN I LIKE TARA ALL THIS TIME GODOSH AM I STUPID SO KNOW I KONW WHY KAYLA SAYS WHY GUYS DUMB CUZ WE TRULY ARE AND SO NOW I AM NOT DATING AND WORKING ON FIXING MY FRIENDSHIP WITH TARA WICH I HOPE ONE DAY I COULD GET MY PRENCESS BACK

face plant

FACE PLANT

THIS WEEK HAS BEEN UP AND DOWN LIKE A STUPID ROLLER COSTER MOST OF U KNOW THAT I STARTED DATIN THAT WAS THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE UD PROBLY ASK WHY WELL FIRST OFF IT WENT TO FAST WE ONLY KNOW EACHER FOR A WEEK WAY TO FAST AND SECONDLEY IJUST FOUND THAT THIS GURL THAT LIKE AND HAPPENDS TO BE MY BESTEST FRIEND LKIES ME BAC I DID NOT ASK HER CUZ DID THINK SHE WOULD DATE ME BOY IAM BEATING MY SELF UP BUT I THINK GOD TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING ALL WEEK HES BEEN BUGGING ME IDONT KNOW WHAT HE WANT SO HERE I AM TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT HE WANT SO IT SEEM LIKE HE WANT ME TO DO SOME THING BUT I DONT KNOW WHAT BUT ALLS I KNOW IS THAT I BEEN THINKING ABOUT SHCOOL

AND IT THE SAME ONE ALL THE TIME TO ITS A SCOOOL IN OLATHE KANSAS I BEEN TO IT A COUPLE TIMES AND I REALLY LIKE IT HMM I DONT KNOW I FELL GOD MOVEING THNGS PRETTY MUCH GOD I REMOLDING ME BYT IF KEEP TRUSTING HIM IT WILL BE COOL

PHIL

face plant